Support & Compliments
I had a revelation recently. I was feeling really bad after my therapist asked who supported me and I couldn't think of anyone I really turn to. She said that if we constantly push away support people will stop offering it. I didn't think much of it because I didn't feel like people really offer me support very often for me to even be ABLE to turn it down. Then, about a week later I was discussing something with a friend and she was saying that people always compliment her but never challenge her or give her areas of growth/critiques and that it feels really insincere when all they have to say are good things. I realized that when people give you a compliment, whether it is sincere or not they are, in essence trying to support you; trying to make you feel good or better, or recognize your strengths. Not only that, but if you can't take that compliment, why would they think you could take a critique? And if you continue to brush off those compliments, why would they continue to try offering that support?
I'm complimenting people a lot more these days and recognizing that as long as my intent is to support their strength, individuality, or happiness there is nothing fake or insincere about it.